A Plea for Forgiveness – A Husband who wronged His Wife and Child

The spirit Arnel was standing on an elevated path watching a man climb up. He was experiencing great difficulty; the trek had exhausted him. Arnel was invisible to the other beings residing in the second sphere of heaven. As Arnel tracked the man climbing, he saw a woman, sitting higher up looking out at the expanse – deep in thought. Then from a path beyond the woman, he saw another woman, who shined brightly – a spirit from a higher level – walking towards them, with a child in hand.

Arnel remained invisible, content to observe and learn. He was sent here for a purpose. He knew he had something to do with helping the man … but, as in many instances in the spirit realm, people come together, not by chance; for a specific purpose.

Arnel told his story to the Rev G. Vale Owen on November 3rd, 1920. Arnel studied the man, approaching the woman alone. He knew his history:

“I stood there and read him. He had passed from Earth life somewhere about middle age. He had gone to one of the hells, and had worked his way painfully onward until he reached this dim place. The magnet which drew him was remorse for wrong done, and love for one who had passed on a little before him. This one, made frenzied by much anguish, had thrown herself into the waters, and her life went out of her. She went then to the Sphere One, but was specifically guarded, for she had suffered much at his hands, and soon was able to poise her mind for advance toward the light.”[i]

The man, who had terribly treated his wife was climbing to beg for forgiveness. His wife had committed suicide to escape her tormentor. Now she was in heaven, pondering her plight.

Suicide – Leaving Your Life’s Plan Early

Unlike other suicides, it seems the woman was protected and not penalized for departing from her assigned trials on earth prematurely. The spirit realm must have felt she was already subjected to too much pain and suffering, to have to live out the rest of her natural lifespan in the Lower Zone.

Spiritists, are taught that we must pay in this life or the next for the wrongs we have committed. But for suicide, the payment is immediate. In Andre Luiz’s first book, Nosso Lar, psychographed by Francisco C. Xavier, published in 1944, Andre dies and is sent to:

“Actually, I felt like a prisoner trapped behind dark bars of horror. With my hair on end, my heart pounding, and scared stiff, I often cried out like a madman. I begged for mercy and clamored against the painful despondency that had taken hold of my spirit. But when my loud cries didn’t fall on an implacable silence, they were answered by lamenting voices even more pitiful than my own. At other times, sinister laughter rent the prevailing silence. I thought that some unknown companion out there was a prisoner of insanity. Diabolical forms, ghastly faces, animal-like countenances appeared from time to time, increasing my panic. When it wasn’t pitch dark, the landscape seemed to be bathed in a lurid light as if shrouded in a thick mist that was warmed from afar by the rays of the sun.”[ii]

Sounds horrible. Andre told of people coming to him and calling out “Suicide!”, but he knew he didn’t commit suicide. It wasn’t until he was rescued by the spirits from the celestial city Nosso Lar, that he discovered that he was a suicide, an “unconscious suicide”, which denotes that he drank and whored himself to death (or more explicitly, syphilis and liver damage killed him). Andre stayed in that location until he finally prostrated himself and begged for God’s mercy and forgiveness.

In another book, Memoirs of a Suicide, by the Spirit Camilo Candido Botelho, published in 1955, psychographed by Yvonne A. Pereira. Camilo, who was a famous Portuguese author, committed suicide in June 1, 1890. He writes of the landscape where he found himself:

“Within its winding gorges and sinister caves, spirits that used to be men and women on the earth howled like hordes of infuriated demons, demented by the absolutely unconceivable intensity and strangeness of the sufferings that tormented them.

In that awful place that distraught eyes of the condemned were unable to discern even the slightest gentle outline of a tree that might bear witness to their hours of desperation; or any comforting scenery, for that matter, that might distract them from the wearisome contemplation of those gorges, where no other expression of life could enter other than that of supreme horror!

The ground, covered with fetid, dark soot-like matter was filthy, pasty, slippery and repugnant! The heavy air was asphyxiating, icy and darkened by threatening clouds, as if never-ending storms were roaring all around. When they inhaled, the spirits confined there would choke, as if the pulverized matter, more noxious than ash and lime, had invaded their respiratory tract, tormenting them with a torture unimaginable to a human mind used to the glorious light of the sun – that celestial gift that blesses the earth every day – and the life-giving currents of salutary breezes that invigorate the physical bodies of the planet’s inhabitants.”[iii]

The absence of the sun, the presence of pitiful creatures, the filth, all in common with both experiences. Not a good place to be. The spirit world must have desired to create a place that would be worse than whatever drove you to the conclusion that death would be a better alternative.

Why does such pain await for suicides and for people who drink, use drugs, or smoke themselves to death? Because, when we are reincarnated, we are expected to live through our trials, our lessons. The act of dropping out of those classroom activities is not an option.

We are told that when a person commits suicide, they will usually reside in this terrible place for the number of years that they would have normally lived. This is why, we have an obligation to live to our agreed upon lifespan.

After all, many of us are participants in mapping out the trials we shall experience while incarnated on earth. Life on earth is a privilege. We are given the chance to come to earth to improve ourselves, not to flee from adversity.

The woman in sphere two, must have had a marriage that turned out worse than planned. This could certainly occur, given that her husband would have his free will to be as cruel as he desired.

Nevertheless, for the vast majority of us, we must remember, as said many times in books psychographed by Chico Xavier and in the books by Allan Kardec, we are not given trials that we don’t have a way to be triumphant. While the road may seem impossible, there is always a method for a successful exit.

Mother and Child Reunite

Arnel continues:

“I watched him as he stood to rest. He shaded his eyes and gazed steadfastly aloft, and I saw he was looking at the same woman. She sat upon the top of the bank and, looking upward, he saw her side-face. But she did not see him because, viewed from her own station, his less progressed form would have been very dim to her sight. And among the rocks whereabouts he moved, to her he was quite invisible.

I saw a look of strange eagerness come into his face, a look of love and of sorrow and pity. Yes, there was some evidence of increasing goodness in him now. So he strove upwards towards her and I could see a plea for forgiveness upon his lips.”[iv]

As the man was watching his wife, whom he had so horribly treated, the woman walking down the path with the child, let go of his hand and let him run towards the man’s wife. The boy appeared to be between ten and twelve.

The man stopped and took in the scene of the boy running as fast as he could to his wife. When the boy reached her, he immediately embraced and kissed the woman on her cheek. Arnel tells us what happened next:

“She looked startled at this, and in much doubt as to its meaning. She pressed back her shoulders, and looked upon his face, and cried out afraid. But, on impulse of great love, she thrust aside her fear and, taking him close within her bosom, she fell to tears.

At last he said: ‘Nay, my mother, do not cry so. All has been told to me, my mother, and I know it was not your hand which thrust me hence off Earth into these realms of spirit. It was very wicked that he should do that. And this, dear mother, is but one of his many very great sins. But you and I and my angel will help him, mother, and in some long time perhaps he will come over here good and beautiful, dear, as others have done before.’

But still she wept with head upon her knees, now in shame and great sorrow. So he, being released, looked around him. Just above where she sat there spread a tree of blossom. So he stood upon the bank and, stretching upward, broke a beautiful spray. This he wove into a wreath and, going to his mother, kissed her upon the hair and then encircled the kiss with the crown of flowers.”[v]

He must have been murdered by his father at a very young age, for at first his mother didn’t recognize him. Knowing about the tragic death of her son at the hands of a man she had to live with, must have eventually caused her to kill herself. The spirit realm, knowing all about her, forgave her early exit, and understood the impossibility of remaining in that situation.

The boy, murdered at an early age, was led by good spirits to be raised in the spirit world – where many children are taken. They are blessed with a second chance to reform their character by being brought up amongst love and kindness. They are raised in a kingdom of tranquility, wonderment, and with a sense of higher purpose. Whereupon graduation they await their chance to incarnate again to the school of earth.

The actions of the man seeing and understanding the interplay between the boy and his mother is described by Arnel:

“When the boy stood upon the bank-top the man over there below him saw him for the first time. He looked up at him very curiously. He seemed to be aware of some affinity with the boy which he could not define. But when he saw the lad kiss his mother and crown her with the flowers, his perplexity was resolved suddenly, and with no further effort of his own. A look of horror and frenzied fear came upon him, his face turned livid and he, collapsing, fell headlong down the hill. He struck one boulder after another and at length lay inert and still at the bottom of the pass where the mist was gathered. And where he lay it became more dense than elsewhere, attracted towards him by the conditions about his spirit. I knew that he would be a hard man to deal with, for to his fear I saw a sudden hatred added.”[vi]

There are several essential points to consider. First, the physical marks from the man’s fall into the crevice, are in his own mind. He can’t die from any injuries in the spirit world. He only thinks he is in pain and his body is damaged, therefore he lays as if he was severely injured.

Secondly, even in the second sphere, a spirit, not schooled in the power of their mind can change their surroundings by their thoughts. Arnel pointed out how the area around the man became denser, more matter than energy, to conform to the level of his mind.

Even a soul who made it to one of the initial levels of heaven has trouble with controlling primitive urges and emotions.

Medium’s Meeting in Rio de Janeiro

One sees the inability to forgive, to forget, to allow a second chance everywhere. Both in the physical

The Mediums Book

and spirit worlds. I was at a mediums meeting in Rio de Janeiro in 2014 when I witnessed an encounter pertaining to the inability to let go of anger. A women spirit began talking through a female trance medium. Immediately she began complaining about her life in general.

“How could someone study, go to school, be educated, and wishing to be a good wife and yet spend a long time locked in her own house by her husband. And if that is not enough, her husband then marked her face with a red-hot iron. He burned all of my face.”

Then she cried and said she was sad. She seemed to believe her face was still disfigured, even though she has left her physical body.

Next her husband possessed another trance medium and he said, “I feel very terrible I did this, but you know during those times the husband totally owned his wife.”

I immediately thought; this must be a couple from many years ago, when women had no rights.

The counselor medium told him, “I understand your regret.”

The husband responded, “Yes, you are right. All I want is her forgiveness. I am very regretful.”

This is a very tragic situation, the wife lives in constant anger of what was done to her and the husband cannot move on due to his realization of his terrible behavior. Her absolute anger is understandable, but it reached a point that her negative thoughts are detrimental to her own health. Who knows how many decades both have been merely existing in this twilight zone. They seemed locked in the lower regions, unable to progress through forgiveness and love.


The boy took his mother by the hand to meet the older woman. As the mother approach her, she became denser, so the mother could see her. Seeing the bright angel who had helped her son, the mother fell to her knees and began to cry. She couldn’t stop herself, such was her relief and regret for all that had passed.

Arnel noticed the boy, the mother, and the man all had the same hair color. They all retained the form into which they were incarnated while on earth.

Arnel knew the benevolent angel would take care of the boy and his mother. He turned away and went in search of the man who had fallen down the hill. Arnel tells us what he did and the plan for the man:

“I descended into the valley where the man lay still in stupor. I did not rouse him, but I carried him to a place of refreshment where, when he had rested, he would be given his next task to do. That task would be to eliminate all taint of self and of hatred from his heart, and fill it up with humility instead. That will take him a long, long time. For when a man hates where he should do penance and plead for pity, well, that is a very sorry plight to come to, and hard to rectify. He will do it, he will have to do it before he moves ahead once more. But it will take him long, long years withal.”[vii]

How many daily dramas occur on earth and its surrounding areas? The quest for redemption for our mistakes are hard to achieve with a part of us still self-righteous in our anger. We break from our blame of others very reluctantly, as we are giving up a cherished heirloom. A piece of us that had sustained our mood and gave comfort to us in our time of need. But the comfort only served to prolong our error, not erase it. To move forward we have to cast-off all life vests and throw ourselves into the waters of love and truth.

We have to defeat that remnant of us that demands recognition and acceptance. We long to be told that what we did, even though it was horrible, was really the right thing to do. All of that is false pride. It is a false foundation of our character. It must be demolished and rebuilt. Even though we may feel empty for a while; in the long run we shall be stronger.

The first place is to learn what the basic tenets of Spiritism are and how to improve your life is to read The Spirits Book, by Allan Kardec, or you can read my books, one on reincarnation, The Case for Reincarnation – Your Path to Perfection, the other about the spirit realm, and how we fit into it, Explore Your Destiny – Since Your Life’s Path is (mostly) Predetermined. You will find out why you are on this planet and where you are destined to be.


Brian Foster has a BSCS degree and a MBA. He has worked in R&D for medical device corporations and in IT for large financial institutions. Brian Foster has a blog at www.nwspiritism.com.

Works Cited

Owen, R. G. (1971). The Outlands of Heaven. London: The Greater World Association Trust.

Pereira, Y. A. (2012). Memoirs of a Suicide. Brasilia (DF), Brasil: International Spiritist Council (EDICEI).

Xavier, F. C. (2010). Nosso Lar. Brasilia – (DF), Brazil: International Spiritist Council.

[i] Owen R. G. The Outlands of Heaven, The Greater World Association Trust, p. 107

[ii] Xavier, F. C., Nosso Lar, EDICEI, p. 17

[iii] Pereira, Y. A., Memoirs of a Suicide, EDICEI, pp. 19-20

[iv] Owen R. G. The Outlands of Heaven, The Greater World Association Trust, p. 107

[v] Owen R. G. The Outlands of Heaven, The Greater World Association Trust, p. 108

[vi] Owen R. G. The Outlands of Heaven, The Greater World Association Trust, p. 108

[vii] Owen R. G. The Outlands of Heaven, The Greater World Association Trust, p. 109

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