Message from the Spirit Realm – You Should be Happy in your Commitments

Happiness in your commitments is natural in heaven. In the higher spheres, where we return after a life of struggle, victorious in our quest to improve and do more good than the mistakes we regret, being happy is the normal state. You are surrounded by positive people, there are no worries about money or your job, while it may be challenging, isn’t in danger of disappearing. Sickness only exists on the physical plane and your age and appearance is whatever you want it to be.

But to prepare ourselves for life in heaven, we should cultivate how to welcome and prosper in our relationships and careers while on earth. With the knowledge that almost nothing happens to us by chance on this planet, we need to sit through our classes attentive and serene. Happy in the prospect of what awaits us when the final bell rings.

The Spirits Book, answers a question put to the spirits by the codifier of Spiritism, Allan Kardec:

921. We can conceive that man will be happy upon the earth when the human race shall have been transformed; but, meanwhile, is it possible for each man to ensure for himself a moderate amount of happiness?

Man is more often the artisan of his own unhappiness. If he obeyed the law of God, he would not only spare himself much sorrow, but would also procure for himself all the felicity that is compatible with the grossness of earthly existence.”[i]

Every action has a reaction, the Law of Karma, should always be foremost in our minds. Almost everything we experience that is a hardship is a result of a deed that we need to repair. Therefore, be thankful for the opportunity in whatever you encounter in life. After all, don’t we feel exuberant when we wrongly insulted or hurt a friend and then found a way to make them feel better? Such a relief!

Use this same emotion in your entire life. The spirit Joanna adds to this:

“You are a rough stone in need of polishing. Even though you may be rough on the outside, you have the brightness of the stars in the inside, and it is up to you to release it.

Start this new process in your life right now.

Give yourself the chance to prove to yourself how much you have and you will succeed.

Experience the pleasure of rebuilding your future and you will start being happy right away.”[ii]

Happiness is a state of mind, it is an attitude that you can cultivate. It can sustain you through the bad times in any commitment – and there will be rough patches. Sometimes, for the good of all parties, you may have to leave a marriage, a relationship, or a job. Nevertheless, you will soon take on new commitments … learn from the past and seize the occasion to demonstrate your inner light.

Seize the Opportunity

It’s never too late to start with a new attitude. The spirit Neio Lucio tells how Jesus related the story of a Pharisee who led an exemplary life. He spent days praying in the Temple, he fasted, and he studied the texts of the Old Testament.

When there was a dangerous plague in a city near Jerusalem, a high Angel sought him out to help tend to the sick to alleviate their suffering. But the wise and learned Pharisee didn’t want to make contact with the sick and common people. The Angel spoke to other wise and devout folks, but he got the same answers.

“No one wanted to put themselves at risk.

In light of these excuses not to help, the Messenger from Above found an old criminal who wanted to change his ways. Through invisible threads of thought, the angel invited him to follow him; the old thief really did want to change, so he didn’t hesitate a second. He harkened to the angel’s gentile coercion and quickly devoted himself enthusiastically and genuinely, offering his robust and authentic cooperation to the ministry of aid and salvation.

He buried bodies, concocted medicines that were fitting for the situation, sowed encouragement, relieved the afflicted, renewed the spirits of the sick, freed countless little children who were threatened by the harm, created services of consolation and hope, and in doing so, won solid friendships in Heaven, thereby advancing remarkably in the path toward Paradise.”[iii]

A new beginning is just moments away. A mental note to dive into a new commitment, without hesitation, with dedication and earnestness, will bring its own reward.

We tell our children, when we see them laying around bored and complaining – go out and do something! We know that constructive action wipes away useless thoughts and regrets and refocuses our energy.

The spirit Emmanuel wrote about negative aspects of workers who always complain and blame any and all problems on objects or people other than themselves, whereas:

“Good workers, on the other hand, understand, before anything else, the profound meaning of the opportunity they have received. They not only make use of all their own resources but they also respect other people’s. They do not depend on the seasons. They plant the fruits of the cold and heat with the same enthusiasm. They are friends of nature; they learn its lessons; they are upbeat; and they find the same contentment in both the hard work of sowing and in the joy of harvesting.”[iv]

Good spirits are sending us the message of embracing our work and to seek fulfillment from what our endeavors may teach us. If we can muster the fortitude to strive to be the best as we can possibly be at our jobs, then we are learning the need for perfection in all things.

Our goal is to one day become a perfected spirit. This means we make the correct decisions, know the right answers, and contemplate the long term ramifications of our actions. We hone these skills while on earth.

On earth, during our apprenticeship as an immature spirit, we can make mistakes and do little or no harm. We can begin to comprehend how to analyze situations correctly. We can build upon our thousands of years of experience that is within us in our conscience and instincts, new determinations of what is right and wrong in a myriad of conditions.

If a person resists or detests the work they are in, then careful construction and thoughtful planning are usually discarded. The only lesson learned at the end of a hard day, is that time moves slowly.

The spirit Emmanuel, notifies us of the effectiveness of the combination of work done competently and selfless service for our spiritual growth:

“An honestly practiced profession, even when remunerated, induces people to respect the fulfillment of their duties. But selfless giving, which is one’s sacrifice for the happiness of others, ennobles the spirit. That is why everyone feels the need to build a permanent altar in their hearts to true heroes. Selfless giving begins where duty ends. When practiced, it produces a reaction in the Higher Spheres that reaches down to Humanity. An ordinary delinquent in prison inspires pity because of his suffering. But the pioneer of a noble cause, unjustly jailed in the same prison, elicits admiration, respect and emulation.

The friendly and conscientious administrator who scrupulously divides his earnings and spends his share honestly is an example of earthly virtue. But the person who works selflessly for the benefits of others is a messenger of Heavenly virtues.

A governess who receives a salary for her tender care of a child merits high regard and recognition. But a motherly heart with its constant acts of self-sacrifice is a fascinating and splendid example that empathizes the glory of pure love.

Thus mathematicians, who are acclaimed by the people and are adequately paid for their work, are classified as scientists. But the scientists who are wholly committed to a project for the peace and security of civilization and who employ all their energy in complete oblivion of themselves to reach their goals are regarded as benefactors.

Humankind progress forward when faithful to their obligations. Through selfless giving, angels are drawn to them thereby improving life in the world.”[v]

Working for a goal higher than ourselves, for a tangible good for other humans, while being paid or not, is beneficial – to mankind and to ourselves.

Family Commitments

Messages from spirits via Spiritist mediums have always highlighted the role of family in society and its importance in our quest for improvement. In The Spirits Book, the role of the family is revealed:

774. Some persons have inferred from the abandonment of the young of animals by their parents, that the ties of family, among mankind, are merely a result of social customs, and not a law of nature; what is to be thought of this inference?

Man has another destiny than of the animals; why, then. Should you always be trying to assimilate him to them? There is, in man, something more than physical wants; there is the necessity of progressing. Social ties are necessary to progress; and social ties are drawn closer by family ties. For this reason, family ties are a law of nature. God has willed that men should learn, through them, to love one another as brothers.

775. What would be the effect upon society of the relaxation of family ties?

A relapse into selfishness.”[vi]

“Social ties are necessary to progress” – Commitments to family are all the more important now, in our current culture. Society have been trying its best, since the middle of the Twentieth Century to break the ties of families.

Governments have stepped in to replace spouses, media constantly denigrates the roles of a husband and wife, and the latest social media applications promise instant satisfaction without any ties. Without the family, humans become mere consumers. They are free to indulge in whatever makes them feel good at the time.

This is not to say we should return to the days when single mothers were ostracized or homosexuality was punishable by law or marriage was for life, no matter how terrible it was in the home. Only to point out that society should promote responsibility instead of celebrating irresponsibility.

The spirit Joanna, writing in 1997, in her book Adolescence and Life, stated:

“It is urgent for parents and educators to commit to a reevaluation of the moral conduct intended for the new generations in order to avoid the collapse of culture and civilization, which today are in their darkest period in history ever.”[vii]

The spirit Joanna, who was, in a previous life, Joana de Cusa (mentioned in the New Testament). She also lived at the time of St. Francis of Assisi, and was incarnated as Sister Juana Ines de la Cruz (1651-1695), one of the great poets of her time. The fact that she wrote this was the darkest period in our history, fully illustrates that the arc of society is approaching the heights of materialism.

There needs to be a balance, there needs to be a recognition of our purpose on earth and our requirement for spiritual and character improvement.

The pendulum of freedom of choice for whatever lifestyle one desires, no matter what the consequences are for innocent bystanders, such as innocent children, has gone too far. It should return to the center, where exceptions occur and those people are helped. Where loving relationships between any combinations of genders are encouraged and supported.

It all comes down to staying involved, if possible, with the lives of loved ones and family. And, this is the vital point, the family we are born into and the family we create are all part of our customized plan for our edification.

Jose Herculano Pires explains the ties between spirits and physical families:

“Every spirit that reincarnates brings its personality intact within itself, already formed in previous reincarnations. The similarities of psychological and moral characteristics among parents, children and other descendants do not come from the physical body, but rather from their spirits. The uniqueness of each human being is represented by what each one actually is on its own. Therefore, there is a Cartesian parallelism between heredity and affinity. Once we admit to this conclusion, which today has been carefully considered by great scientific research centers, it is easy for us to understand the need for both social and emotional independence for these children who have emancipated themselves, and especially for the ones who have built their own family.

Spiritual affinities do not imply dependence and submission because each spirit is directly responsible for its own evolution. Parents are responsible for their children regarding guidance offered through examples and education.”[viii]

Therefore, the likeness, in personality, aptitude, and talents of a son or daughter to one or both of their parents, isn’t just a factor of genetics and upbringing. It is deeper. It extends into the spirit realm, where these spirits were on the same level. Where the Law of Affinity brought this group together because they were of like mind and spiritual level. They may have been a family unit in previous lives and have chosen to once again support each other during their schooling on earth.

Imagine the feeling of leaving your family because of your search for pleasure or a momentary desire, which you could not combat, and then finding out, when you returned to the spirit world, that your real family, those you have cherished for centuries, are the very ones you deserted.

It has happened. These poor souls are full of regrets when they discover their mistake. In one instance a man went to earth on a mission. His six best friends, who have been his companions for thousands of years, were to be part of his family on earth.  He was born into a family, where his mother died, then his father remarried. His father and step-mother had six more children. Later, his father died. He was left as the main supporter of the family.

He hated begin dragged down by his step-mother and the children, so he left, never looking back, happy to be free of the responsibilities. Leaving the poor family destitute.

When he died, he found out that he and his six friends were to be part of a mission to help others on earth. He was to be a lynchpin of the entire plan. Instead, through his rejection of his moral commitments, he betrayed his friends and himself.

His spiritual pain was immense. He wanted to return to earth to try once again to repair the damage he caused. He will be allowed to, since there is always an opportunity for redemption.

Fulfillment in the Family

The spirit Joanna sets the reason to be happy in your commitment to your family:

“The special treasure that is the family constellation reaches fulfillment after the long existential journey when, from the first encounter, the two spirits that decide to build the bloodline group, come together through the strong ties of love.

Legalizing its union through marriage, the moral responsibility is structured on the respect and dedication that exists among the partners of this significant undertaking.

Aware of the serious commitment to which they give themselves to, little by little, they discover the greatness of the art and science of love, facing all the difficulties and challenges ahead of them.

Setting objectives that are always multiplied and opened to broader prospects, the adventure of the union provides them with the intellect and moral development that serve as a compass for the future fruition to which they aspire.

From the moment when the physical union provides the possibility for the advent of the offspring, the couple’s personal aspirations shift and will be geared towards other spirits that will be temporarily entrusted to them, in the condition of divine loans they will have to account for, after concluding the ministry of care of their evolving needs.

During the existential course, going through the inevitable clashes of the process of education and rehabilitation, the feelings of affection and duty consolidate, upon working the consciousness that extends the capacity of discernment in relation to life and the compromises resulting from the spiritual knowledge that commands for the route.

All the commitment applied, often turned into personal sacrifice and renunciation, expresses itself in grand and eloquent silences and sufferings well taken, so that the offspring may develop without the marks of the conflicting emotional instability of the parents or the less fortunate circumstances of the social group, particularly in the family structure.

In the long history of coexistence between the dependent little children and the adults, be they of a past or a present nature in relation to the domestic group, the psychological maturity develops in the relationship that should turn into motivation for the future, as a way of mending the disruptive past, with the aim of attaining balance and spiritual enlightenment of all those who are part of the domestic structure.

In this organization, in which spirits come together, sometimes repeating experiences previously thwarted, where sick feelings and inferior emotions are revived in a kaleidoscope of tests and atonements, the opportunities for moral renewal and mental elevation are manifested so that the results of full love may be harvested.

In charge of events that are presented within a well-established program, or that appears suddenly, the two parents responsible for the family constellation are the harvesters of the past achievements and at the same time, the sowers of the future in constant movement of self-enlightenment.”[ix]

What Joanna is trying to convey is the rich and complicated tapestry of life we lead. The spirit world plans out each individual life, but this isn’t done in a vacuum. Each life’s plan must coincide and complement all of the plans which intersects each individual.

Hence, our lives are a series of tests, within a series of tests for others. They may be our spouse, our children, our extended family, and strangers. The lives in which we touch and move the most are our family. Therefore, within the familiar group the project plan of trials and tribulations are the most closely correlated.

In order for plans germinated in the spirit realm to come to fruition, each of us must play their part and follow through in our commitments. By running away, we not only harm ourselves, but the detailed plans of those around us.

There was a near death experience of a young man who was severely injured. He was told he could come back to life, but he would be in pain for many years. The spirits showed him the changes which would occur if he chose to leave the earth before his life’s plan was finished.

His mother and father would divorce because of the pain of his death. His sister, instead of having a good career and life in front of her, would sink into drug abuse. Both of his parents, alone and bitter, would lead empty lives until their deaths.

On the other hand, if he lived his family would be proud of him, for he would be the first of his extended relations to graduate from college, and his parents and sister would make great strides in their quest for spiritual growth.

His life intersected his family and his absence would have devastating results. Who knows how many other personal paths of enlightenment would be altered?

Therefore, following our commitments, and being joyful and happy in those commitments is one of the most poignant and beautiful labors of love we can perform.


Learn about the spirit realm, your place in it and how we are guided to the path of learning. Read my series of three books.

Heaven and Below

Spirits and the Spirit Universe

How we are Guided by Spirits





[i] Kardec, Allan, The Spirits Book, White Crow Publishing, question 921, p. 470

[ii] Franco, Divaldo, Times of Health and Conscientiousness, Leal Publisher, p. 25

[iii] Xavier, F. C., Jesus in the Home, EDICEI, p. 100

[iv] Xavier, F.C., The Way, the Truth and the Life, EDICEI, p. 159

[v] Xavier, F.C., Thought & Life, Roundtable Publishing Limited, pp. 65-66

[vi] Kardec, Allan, The Spirits Book, White Crow Publishing, questions 774-775, pp. 398-399

[vii] Franco, Divaldo, Adolescence and Life, LEAL, p. 9

[viii] Xavier, F. C., Pires, J. H. Spiritual Wisdom: Missives of Hope, Spiritist Alliance for Books, p. 23

[ix] Franco, Divaldo, Family Constellation, Leal Publisher, pp. 175-176

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